The holidays are full of excitement, connection and change. When it is all said and done, many children—especially toddlers and preschoolers—experience a surge in big feelings. You may even find yourself wondering, What did I do wrong?
Take a breath. These emotional spikes are normal and developmentally appropriate. Here is why big feelings often show up after the holidays, and what can help.
Routines were disrupted (for good reason)
Holiday schedules often look very different from everyday life. Later bedtimes, skipped or delayed naps, travel time and different or new caregivers are all part of the season.
Young children rely on predictable routines to feel safe and secure. When those routines change, returning to normal can feel impossible. This can show up as more tears, clinginess or meltdowns.
Sensory overload has a come-down
The holidays bring extra noise, more people, new places and lots of stimulation. Even fun experiences can overwhelm a child’s nervous system.
During busy moments, children may not be able to express how they feel. But once things calm down, those feelings often rise to the surface. This can sometimes look like new behaviors such as hitting, biting or big reactions to seemingly small frustrations.
Big emotions, limited skills
Little kids feel emotions strongly and are still learning how to manage them. They do not yet have the skills to calm themselves or explain what they need.
What looks like misbehavior is often a child asking for help regulating their emotions. Your calm presence helps them learn how to handle those big feelings over time.
Transitions are hard
Saying goodbye to visitors, losing extra time with you and seeing familiar decorations come down can bring feelings of loss, frustration or confusion—even if the holiday season was calm and joyful.
Transitions take practice. Children may need extra reassurance as they adjust, and involving them in the process—like talking about changes ahead of time or letting them help—can make a big difference.
What helps right now
You do not need to fix everything at once. Small, steady steps can make a big difference.
- Stay calm and present: When emotions run high, your calmness helps your child feel safe. If it helps, pause and take a few deep breaths before responding (you may even find they mirror this later).
- Name and validate feelings: If it feels right in the moment, try naming what you see: “You’re feeling sad that Grandma left.” Feeling understood can help your child settle and learn valuable self-regulation skills.
- Keep expectations gentle: Give your child—and yourself—some flexibility for a few weeks. Adjustment takes time.
- Re-establish routines: Regular, healthy meals, daily physical activity and enough sleep help children feel grounded again. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, consistent routines support children’s emotional health and well-being.
In the end
Big feelings after the holidays are a sign your child is adjusting, not that something is wrong. With time, consistency and connection, things usually return to normal. You are doing exactly what your child needs—showing up, offering comfort and helping them feel safe as they grow.
