{"id":63392,"date":"2026-04-22T04:08:18","date_gmt":"2026-04-22T04:08:18","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.firstthingsfirst.org\/?post_type=first-things&#038;p=63392"},"modified":"2026-05-07T04:09:34","modified_gmt":"2026-05-07T04:09:34","slug":"why-toddlers-hit","status":"publish","type":"first-things","link":"https:\/\/www.firstthingsfirst.org\/es\/first-things\/why-toddlers-hit\/","title":{"rendered":"Managing Big Feelings: Why does my toddler hit?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><b>About Managing Big Feelings<\/b>: This blog is part of the Managing Big Feelings video series, featuring expert insight about hitting, biting, sharing and tantrums from an infant and early childhood mental health specialist, Tiffany Stenson, MC, IMH-E.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If your toddler has started hitting, you are not alone. Hitting is one of the most common behaviors parents see during the toddler years.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When a young child hits, it can feel shocking or frustrating. You may wonder if something is wrong or worry that the behavior will continue.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/jbAoKKDjQDE\" width=\"560\" height=\"314\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The good news is that hitting is often part of normal development. Toddlers are still learning to manage big emotions and interact with others. With guidance and patience, children can learn safer ways to express their feelings.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Positive parenting strategies can help prevent hitting and teach children important emotional skills that will last a lifetime.<\/span><\/p>\n<h1><span style=\"font-size: 40px;\">Why toddlers hit<\/span><\/h1>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many parents search for answers to the question: \u201cWhy does my toddler hit?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Toddlers hit for several common reasons. Most of the time, it is not about being bad. It is about having big feelings and not knowing how to communicate them.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Young children may hit when they are:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Feeling frustrated or overwhelmed<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Struggling to communicate their needs<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Tired, hungry or overstimulated<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Trying to get attention quickly<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Learning how social interactions work<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">At this age, toddlers are still developing language and impulse-control skills. When emotions rise quickly, their bodies may react before they have time to think.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Understanding the reason behind the behavior can help parents respond calmly and supportively.<\/span><\/p>\n<h1><span style=\"font-size: 40px;\">How to stop a toddler from hitting<\/span><\/h1>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Rather than focusing on stopping the hitting, focus on correcting the behavior in the moment. It is about teaching children healthy skills they can use instead.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">These positive parenting strategies can help reduce hitting over time. And most importantly, your response teaches your child how to handle strong emotions.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If hitting happens, keep your message simple and calm. \u201cHitting hurts. I can\u2019t let you hit.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Then redirect your child toward a safer behavior. Consistency helps children understand boundaries while still feeling supported.<\/span><\/p>\n<h1><span style=\"font-size: 40px;\">Teaching empathy and kindness<\/span><\/h1>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When children are calm, it can help to talk about how their actions affected others.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You might say, \u201cThat hurt your friend. Let\u2019s check if they\u2019re okay.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Moments like this help children begin to develop empathy and understand that their actions matter. Over time, these conversations help toddlers learn how to build healthy relationships.<\/span><\/p>\n<h1><span style=\"font-size: 40px;\">Teach words for feelings<\/span><\/h1>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Toddlers often hit because they do not have the words to explain what they feel.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Help your child label their emotions by saying things like:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cThat was hard.\u201d<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cYour body needs to rest.\u201d<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cSay stop if you\u2019re feeling upset.\u201d<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When children learn the language of emotions, they are more likely to express their feelings with words rather than actions.<\/span><\/p>\n<h1><span style=\"font-size: 40px;\">Watch for early signs of frustration<\/span><\/h1>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many toddlers show warning signs before they hit. They might tense their body, yell, grab toys or push. If you notice these signals, step in early and help your child calm down or change activities before the situation escalates.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You can model safe responses by suggesting things like:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Stomping feet or dancing<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Taking deep breaths<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Hit soft pillows or cushions<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Ripping paper or scribbling hard<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Over time, children begin to replace hitting with these safer behaviors.<\/span><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Is your toddler hitting, biting or pushing? Learn why toddlers hit and how positive parenting strategies can help prevent hitting and teach young children safer ways to express big feelings.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":14,"featured_media":4493,"template":"","tags":[22,23,155,313],"class_list":["post-63392","first-things","type-first-things","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","tag-parenting","tag-child-development","tag-mental-health","tag-positive-parenting"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.1 (Yoast SEO v27.1.1) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Managing Big Feelings: Why does my toddler hit? - First Things First<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Understanding why toddlers hit is essential for effective parenting. 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